hack cough sneeze

oh..yes more of the same.
Yesterday was the followup appointment with the dr. i was treated to 3 shots of steroids in my neck. this was close to as much fun as having fluid removed from my knee. close.. but not quite.

Today, the neck does in deed feel a bit better. we'll know after PT today, i figure. I am still just wore the hell outp hysically from this stupid cold. can't hardly think straight. I'm thera-flu'd, robitussin'd, tylenol'd, dayquil'd and still feel like i have a fever.. holy crap with this never end.

work is busy, of course.. still problems with online applications..
its fun working when you are sick....uh..not so much

more sniffle cough sniffle

i believe the cold is actually getting worse. went to PT yesterday, didn't do the exercises in the gym. mostly because i thought that spreading my cold around the gym equipment is just rude. went home and nyquil'd and went to bed. Missed House and Standoff. I think they are on tivo though.

have doctors appointment today at 4. Princess is getting the cold. lots to do at work today. chad starts today, though he will be mostly cleaning his office and setting up his computer.

i feel like crap..thats about the most positive thing today.

sniffle....

holy shit. a cold started on saturday and had progressively kicked my ass. today i can hardly swallow because of the sore throat.

PT today too, i dunno how i am going to do. My neck has been hurting alot for the past ocuple days. Pretty much solid tightness since last thurs. I need to change up the therapy or something. All last week, i left PT feeling worse than i went in. I will talk to her today.

The temp guy has to go. He's been here a week and has pissed off people, told them he can't help them and frankly i'm tired of hearing how great he is and how much everything we have here sucks. he can bitch about it being unemployed...Its a shame, he's a smart kid. just far too arrogant and cocky to do himself good. He'll find some job that wants a new smart ass. He'll get the job and be cut down to size. I don't have the patience to teach him how to be a decent human being. Being an asshole to people because your job is beneath you won't get you far. He won't be coming back on monday.

Did i mention i have a cold? am dying and suffering? my neck and knee hurt? k.. just wondering cause i feel like incredible ass.

Oh, yah.. my guild in WOW has shit the bed. I am being pulled in many directions, don't really want to leave th people, but i thin since the merger of the 2 guilds, there has been like 3 things done. Oh well.. what can i do, the powers that be still haven't gotten things together to set up officers, we are losing more people. I need to figure out how to get some stuff.

{listening to Sexy Ladies by Justin Timberlake}

Friday.. I made it

with so much going on at work, i'm amazed that friday is finally here. There is a huge snow storm coming in and johnica has to go north to get to her crosscountry meet. I am a bit nervous for that, but i spose it will be ok. there are highways closed and its cold as hell today. Don't know if we will get snow, but it sure feels like it. I am nervous about driving the new car on the ice. need new tires first, i think.

the new guy is good, but cocky. oh to be 22 again. its tiring to be unknowingly in a competition, but its not like i don't know what i been talking about. I been in IT longer than he's been alive..hehe.. its entertaining, but tiring.

excited for honey to start the job next week. he is excited too. The new car gets 22 miles/gal.. eek, thats not that hot. better than the expedition i bet.. hehe..

Aaaccckkk!!

Today is wednesday... already. The reason for no posts this week yet? I have been absolutely slammed at work... not just a little, barely a minute to breathe, not taking lunch, slammed. There have been the existing program problems, more people needing something immediately, issues with the billing system (priority #1), odd and ends problems, phones ringing off the hook. And, sadly, for all my complaint about how busy i am, i am grateful that HD dude is gone. I have hired a temp that comes in today to give some help. I have also discovered that HD dude totally fubar'd all of the training laptops and they need to be looked at each and every one of them. *sigh*

Last weekend was hell... I took Princess shopping for all the necessary homecoming things, dress, shoes, make up, hair, nails, jewelry.. I had a great time with her and doing "girl" stuff. Took pics of her and her date. they looked so cute. She said she had a great time.
Had a panic attack when i couldn't the Boy and he wasn't answering his cell phone. He has been grounded for not being where he said he would be and not calling to tell me where he went. On sunday, i went shopping all day, by myself. I probably didn't need to spend the money, but i needed some time just for me. I got quite a few new work clothes, 2 new pairs of shoes, one is a really cute pair of steve madden peep-toe wedges... just adorable. can't wear them until my knee is better.

Speaking of the knee. yesterday was PT. I hurt worse when I left than when I showed up. My regular PT is back and i just am not sure she does enough for me. I will bring it up on thursday. Today i feel like ass, but its not in just a sore, they worked me over way, its an actual my neck back and knee do not feel good today. I still need to make a dr. appt.

The Boy has a game today, not sure if i am going to make it. Princess has XC meet tomorrow..i am definately not going to make it due to PT.

Hopefully today will be a bit slower...hopefully, since i have to train new guy

Dressing for Success

Today, we have a meeting for 3 hours (it might actually be longer) about how to dress in the workplace. this is a mandatory meeting. i am wondering if they think that the people here don't dress nice, because they do. I am just not necessarily looking forward to a meeting chastising me that i don't wear $300 suits to crawl under peoples desks to fix their computers. Unfortunately, until the pay gets better to allow me to afford such suits to get greasy and dirty and dry clean, i will continue to dress in my slacks and shirts. No skirts for this lady. I personally would find it far more unprofessional to see my ass under a desk than to see a chick in pants under my desk. Just my opinion, but, we'll see at the meeting. In my experience, these type of things don't generally take into consideration women doing manual labor in a business environment. Sorry ladies, I am a techie. I lift servers and monitors and desktops. I will test the network port under your desk and in the closet. I will run cable if needed. These activities, do not require a skirt or high heels. Nope.. pants and sensible shoes. Now while I am not necessarily stoked about this meeting, I am however excited that there is a reprieve of the helpdesk as it will be closed for the time of the meeting. This just means I have more work to do when i get out of the meeting, but its a breather and until i get some help, any amount of air I can gulp is great. I do love being busy, sometimes you can be too busy.

I think that Honey's interview went well. we'll see if he gets the job. had a nice lunch yesterday too. did i mention that today is physical therapy day? maybe i will get worked over again, although i am still sore from tuesday. painful, but in a good way, i suppose. I do believe it to be helping over the long haul, but its a painful road to travel. Can't i have the squishy soft road please?

Princess has homecoming, the Boy has some kind of skating event. emergency funds needed for this that and the other thing. Ex is crawling up my ass because he is apparently some kind of parent with god status and nothing i do is right. good thing his girlfriend smokes dope in front of the kids, leaves naked pictures of herself on her camera, competes with a 14 yr old girl for the attention of her dad.. must need the super star of parents to work those logistics. good thing he cant stay in one place for longer than 3 years. also, must need the super star of parents to maintain that rock solid foundation that he likes to bitch to me about not providing because i moved once. i grow tired of his bullshit. he doesn't pay child support (was waived, not necessarily a deadbeat). as long as the kids are with me, he can bitch all he likes. Suck it, my friend, suck it. You can yell and scream at me all you want over the phone about how i don't do things your way. yes, feel free. then, the kids and I will go about our business. When he wants to pay at least 1/2 their support or be something less than vacant like he is at the moment, then i'll think his opinion holds weight. It used to, don't get me wrong. I think he's a good dad. I think his priorities are fucked at the moment and not my business to change that. Pot headed, bitchy pussy > kids. go for it dude.. absolutely go for it. he has given me support on occassion over the past 14 years to do what I needed to for me. Just don't expect me to take your current lifestyle and priorities as something that holds weight with me. Be pissed, be a dick, ex-husband means you don't get to piss me off. I don't allow it. Its frustrating to tell the kids. But, they are teenagers. I tell them to take the issues up with him, not me. I can't change him or control him. They need answers, they need to ask directly. It makes me sad when the kids cry, and that pisses me off cause they don't let him see it. They don't let on how disappointed they are that he abandons plans with them to go off in search of some unknown bullshit. Nope, skippy head goes on about his merry little selfish way and I get to clean up the mess of anger and hurt. They will get it. someday, they will catch on what their dad is all about. It won't take me bad-mouthing him, cause i don't do that. He'll do it all by himself. I love my kids more than anything in the world. I love their dad as my friend and father of my kids. They will learn, as I have, he is a great friend, fun for adventure, smart, funny and engaging; and undependable, self-centered and selfish. I would probably say somewhat of a narcissistic personality. Makes him who he is, which is generally a pretty great guy. I think that its some sort of mid-life crisis with the current girlfriend. I don't get why he's with her. I always know why they are with him. He's exciting. Its a fun lifestyle. Most will grow tired of the uncertainty after a couple years. Most people cannot handle a vagabond lifestyle. Not for years upon end. Its intriguing at first. but the lack of security eventually wears down. The vagabond lifestyle has always been a part of him. And when the kids were little, before school, it didn't matter so much. Now that they are in high school and jr. high, they need to establish themselves somewhere. Johnica went to 4 different jr. highs in 3 years. Thats tough on her. I see it on her myspace and all the people she misses and leaves behind, all the wishing that she never moved. Hopefully, at least now with me, we'll stay here until both are done with HS. Its the plan, I have no view of anything happening that would change that. Things come up, life happens, but i have a strong resolve to let the kids stay where they are until out of high school and moved onto college. then my life will happen. The ex... i wish him well and happiness in all that he does. I hope that he finds someone that actually makes him happy and complements his personality rather than someone who struggles against it. I hope that one day, he doesn't crave that power struggle. I wish that he would pull his head out sometimes and do something for others besides himself. I wish that i could give advice or opinion from past experiences and it would not be disregarded as "hippy bullshit".. ... You know what they say.. wish in one hand, shit in the other and see which one fills up first. I've got gloves on both hands for the long haul with the ex. I knew it since I was 14 when we met. I know it now at almost 36 when we have 2 teenagers. I will know it for many years to come. I know that he is a good guy, with a big heart, if only he would let that come out more often. It is unfortunate that our friendship has waned since the present girlfriend, its been around along time. Whether he likes it or not, I know him better than he wants to believe. I know our kids too. I am glad that he is still my friend after all these years. I am also glad that I am no longer married to him. 13 years ago during the divorce, I was devastated. Couldn't imagine it. Now, I can look back and recognize that it was one of the best things that ever happened to me and him too, and probably the kids for that matter.

long post.. time for meeting.

whats wednesday for?

hump day. therapy yesterday. boy am i sore. I felt better when i left, but now, i am very very sore. didn't get to bed until like 2am because i couldn't get comfortable. watched tv with christopher last night. love house, thought standoff was cool. got the tivo set up. have to buy a homecoming dress for the Princess this weekend. not sure how she will be working that malfunction, but she says she is. did i mention that i am very sore today. man, i was worked over in therapy. when i am doing it, i totally get into it and understand and can actually recognize that this is helpful. the next day, i regret every minute of it. i am so damn sore. my boss asked if i could pull the stick out of my ass. hahaha.. i WISH i could walk like i am not the tin man from wizard of oz. i dont even have red shoes, why am i a cast member? stop the insanity..
oh.. shit.. speaking of stop the insanity, i was watching vh1 and i saw that Susan Powter chick from the 90s stop the insanity horseshit diet program. OMG.. father time has not been kind to that woman. she must be in her early 50's and still has bright pink spikey hair. at what point, do you realize that you are ridiculous and not punk or rebellious or cool? I guess the fact that i will someday be over 50 and have multiple tattoos and the younger generations will think i am just a lame old fogey too. but now is now.. that lady.. she wasn't cool back then, she definately isn't cool now.. vh1 really knows how to dig up the bones from the celebrity closet.

work has calmed down today. things to do. Honey has an interview. I hope it goes well. he needs a job, if not for income but for self esteem. not having a job has gotten to him. good luck, my love.

{listening to shutup by blackeyed peas}

tuesday

what is there to say about a tuesday. it lies after monday, its not close to friday, its just a day that isn't monday or friday or even thursday.. that likes almost friday. nope.. today is tuesday. hopefully work will be a bit calmer than yesterday so i can actually get done some of the work i didn't get done yesterday. man o man yesterday i was psychotic.

the guild merger in my game went through. I am moderately excited about it, though playtime has been cut due to my accident. So many things to do and know and learn. exciting times in game.

i get physical therapy today. i am actually looking forward to it. I also need to schedule a followup dr. appt. got a bill from insurance in the mail for surgery.. couldn't figure out what the hell i had surgery on. it was when they stuck the needle in my knee to remove fluid. Holy shit.. that is classified as surgery? and $300. holy shit, i coulda stole a needle from a herion junkie around the corner from the drs. office and done that myself.. yikes .. $300 what a friggin rip off. oh well.. what can ya do, its the american healthcare system way.

got a tivo. i am excited. haven't set it up yet. looking forward to that... then i can record house and american idol and other stupid shit that i already don't have time to watch...

{listening to Nightingale by Norah Jones}

BAM!

and monday shit hits the fan. more of the same but holy crap am i just swamped and people have their heads up their asses asking me things that are in no way computer related. Yes, i understand it is a web based program. No, i'm sorry, i do not know where the printable tests are for the students or why that particular link is broken. No, it is not recommeneded you delete all of the areas and start over.

I love being busy, and i would prefer they took their time to hire someone good to help me out but today was just crazy.

Went to the celtic festival on saturday. long drive, wore me out on sunday and didn't feel good, but it was worth it. Got some information on custom celtic wedding rings. The Boy had a great time, even though we wouldn't buy him a new sword or dagger. Got about 250 pictures. Will work on blowing some up for wall art. Lots to see and do and Honey got his turkey leg. boy did that make him happy. I had a panic attack because of traffic on the way home and on sunday was migrained out due to my neck.

Today i am feeling better, but still sore. Looking forward to the physical therapy tomorrow. No stayin up late for me. My schedule changed and i'm not looking forward to that since it alternates days. Oh well.

Hopefully tomorrow will be better.. tomorrow has to be better.

TGIF

holy shit this has been the longest short week ever.
HD dude is gone. can't say i'm sad about it, though it means, not necessarily more work, but different. I have to answer phones again, in addition to doing all the work. at least he answered the phones.

PT yesterday was more than painful. I remain true to the statement that it is physical torture, not therapy. I understand why it needs to be done. The fact that it is painful and physically exhausting proves it. my neck is still jacked. I have blisters all over my knee from the brace.

Haven't been able to do much this week with my neck being totally scrunched up and stiff and sore. today is raining. I wish i could be home cuddled up with a book or movie.

whew

I think i barely escaped yesterday. I left work early because my neck was just too much to bear without pain meds. I rescheduled my PT for earlier in the day, went there, then home, then to bed. can't say there was anything to my day except for sleep and pain meds. i didn't eat. i think i remember both kids coming in and giving me a hug, but i didn't move. guess that makes it a fan-dandy day, right? i didn't think so, but i was out of it and not feeling the pain anymore so i guess it was better than it started out.

today, i am stiff and sore and in pain, but the headache is dull enough to stop the vomiting from yesterday, so its better and i'm pretty sure i can make it through the day.


{listening to Head over Feet by Alanis Morrisette}

feels like monday

but it is tuesday. i am hurting, much like the weekend. I rode to cripple creek with Roommate and have not been the same since. a simple 40 min drive should not render me incapacitated for 3 days following. I have been in bed and on meds since i got home. I hate feeling like a cripple. Couldn't go out to the pub with Roommate as planned, though it was good to finally get out and do something, even though that will be my last trip for a while. anywhere. i hope that i am able to travel around thanksgiving.

i am somehow pushing through work today. it is a must, just too much going on. i am grateful this weekend that the kids had other things to do because i just couldn't do anything.

my neck is so stiff with a golf ball sized knot in the left side. this knot always seems to be there, but just increases and decreases. been doing all of the PT exercises and it gives some momentary relief, but not for long. since the drive i have had shooting pains from my knee up into my thigh and my lower back has just been sore and achy.

keep on truckin.. thank goodness for short weeks.

Heh..

You are 93% Scorpio

How Scorpio Are You?

can i get a woot!

Today is friday. hopefully quiet as I am the only one here. Just seems as though ths week has been dragging on forever. Looking forward to the 3-day weekend. can't really drive anywhere because of the neck and back, but thats ok. The kids have plans. They have no school today, so last night they both spent the night at friends house. Tonight Princess has football game and dance to attend. Don't know what Boy has planned. I have some in-game raiding to do, maybe sci-fi friday shows. tomorrow they both have sleepovers planned again. Hrm. maybe Honey and I should do something. hrmm..

Princess moved from 12th to 9th in her meet yesterday so she goes to the NM invitational next weekend. That just rocks. she is quite the little runner and may be ready for her marathon in Dec. The Boy is still sticking it out in football and found his cleats. I'm glad. them getting stolen pissed me off. He has lost like 10lbs, so I think he likes the results that playing is giving him. I hope he keeps it up and recgonizes that even if he isn't a starter, he's doing well for himself with the exercise.

Speaking of exercise. holy shit. Physical therapy my ass. torture. Simple stretching, muscle strengthening exercises HURT.. today I am sore as if i had worked out for 3 hrs including cardio and weight lifting. Man. Maybe i'll lose some weight from having to do these exercises. They give them to me for one leg. I just do them on both legs. Can't have one skinny leg and one fat one, now can i? I am barely moving, sore but slight bit less pain, so i think the exercises actually are helping. but man, yesterday they were pure hell.

Ready for the weekend at 7am on friday. yep... definately time to go home and relax.

{listening to In My Place by Coldplay}